_______      __    __ ___ ___       __ __ 
 |   _   .----|__.--|  |   Y   .---.-|__|  |
 |.  1   |  __|  |  _  |.      |  _  |  |  |
 |.  _   |____|__|_____|. \_/  |___._|__|__|
 |:  |   |             |:  |   |            
 |::.|:. |             |::.|:. | Issue 7
 `--- ---'             `--- ---' 2020-02-18

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NEWSLETTER: OH GOD OH FUCK 
https://neozones.neocities.org/acidjaw/mail/issue7
https://wiki.squeeze.pizza/index.php?title=AcidMail/issue7

This issue we have:
* Be a handsome anime boi!
* The computer is my soul
* THE MOST EVIL WEBSITE EVER

-------------------------------------------------

>INSERT WELCOME HERE
Lorem ipsum dolor amet ea hammock vape banh mi
disrupt la croix glossier in waistcoat letterpress
hoodie boogie woogie ad kinfolk cray gluten-free
no sugar. Austin palo santos chicharrones keytar
vinyl, fugiat literally ramps OWO. Pok pok schlitz
chartreuse synth blog photo booth normcore cillum
bitters. Lyft banjo kazooie chartreuse, leggings
PBR&B velit fanny pack deep v microdosing. Before
they sold out mlkshk health goth testicle eiusmod
vaporwave. Pitchfork stumptown brunch et portland.

Welcome once again to "you know" (See page title
for more details). This would be the second time
that its not the head editor writing the issue,
but rather a proud member of NeoZones...
I don't know if it is allowed to say names, I will
have to ask him when he returns from Liverpool,
Minecraft in The Pursuit of Happyness.

-------------------------------------------------

>BE A HANDSOME ANIME BOI!
Are you ugly? Women don't want you? Do you want to
be attractive to women, straight men *and* people
with weird fetishes? You want to stop reading this
text as if it were part of an informercial? If you
had knowledge about artificial intelligences, Deep
Dream and other stuff, surely you've already heard
of pages like Melobytes (https://melobytes.com/)
or This Waifu Does Not Exist
(https://www.thiswaifudoesnotexist.net/). And just
as we could hire a robot to write more AcidJaw
issues, you can become an anime boy thanks to the
technology and magic of machine learning! 

The process is as simple as breathing; just upload
a photo of your horrendous face, put your email,
they will not ask for your credit card number or
the three numbers on the back or the expiration
date of it, check your email in about 10 minutes
and voila, your own photo of yourself in kawaii!

Warning: Despite the results, you will remain ugly
in real life.

https://selfie2anime.com/

-------------------------------------------------

>THE COMPUTER IS MY SOUL
Nicholas Fedorov is an American animator, musician
and artist who has gained notorious fame and cult
status on the Internet thanks to his animations
that are very reminiscent of the three-dimensional
style of the 90s animations. The content of
Nicholas Fedorov has a great variety of topics,
some of them parody characters from existing
cartoons, and others present original concepts.
All his creations are fascinating due to the level
of authenticity that applies to the style of
animation, although some may seem them terrifying
due to the (possibly) nightmare-inducing style.

One of his best-known animations is a music video
titled THE COMPUTER, originally released in 2015.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R8wrT6J8sNo
https://archive.org/details/NicholasFedorovTHECOMPUTEROfficialVideo

What makes Fedorov's content especially
interesting is his ability to recreate vintage
stuff that really shines, you know, the VHS lines,
the over-saturated look, the cheesy CGI effects
and the fact these videos look 25 years out of
date. Fedorov has been known to use old computers
and software from the 90's to create his videos,
and also uses an actual VCR to process his videos
for the vintage look.

Unfortunately, his videos have recently been rare
to find, as years ago he deleted his channel and
social media, either because some kept using
trendy words such as "autism and vapowave" in his
comments or because it wasn't the kind of fame he
expected, to the point that several might have
harassed him. Like any avant-garde artist, he is a
normal person in real life despite his half-creepy
content, and has said on multiple occasions that
he has an interest in vintage CG animation of the
90's, retro computers, anime, programming, and
classic video games.

Almost all of this content can now be found either
by looking in the deepest guts of the web, on
YouTube or simply in this nice link on Archive.org.
Hopefully one day he will have enough motivation
to give us more of his message, his aesthetics,
his music and his art.

https://archive.org/details/nicholasfedorovcompletearchive

-------------------------------------------------

>ASCII OF THE NOW
The ASCII of The Now is a weekly thing we do
where we dig threw the old archives of forgotten
websites, finding ASCII art that time forgot.

For this week, we have something we are very sure
everyone can relate to. In this situation, we see
an individual sitting on top of a (possibly)
ceramic piece, doing some daily ritual that
tackles his needs to release all the impurities
from his body. How long will be there? Probably a
few minutes if they are not in a Taco Bell
bathroom...

           _
          ( }
    ====  /\\
    |  | / /\\
    |__|_L_==n
      L(   ) |
       (___) L

http://www.chudnovsky.org/gallery/ascii/HTML/pee.htm

-------------------------------------------------

>THE MOST EVIL WEBSITE EVER
What you are about to see is the worst of the web,
the most evil that has ever existed in the entire
history of the internet, run by an evil
corporation that plans to dominate human minds and
control their lives to become richer and more
powerful. They are behind the elite that controls
the world, with evil intentions, with enough
capacity to destroy the lives of millions, no,
BILLIONS of people. Worse than the holocaust,
worse than communist revolutions, worse than any
natural disaster that has wiped out entire cities,
entire societies, and humanity itself! They
control a very large part of the internet - nobody
can escape - you can run but not hide from them.
In some future, we will be slaves of the system,
thanks to them we will be part of the system,
everything is connected, all part of a conspiracy
that plans to take control of humanity itself, and
even dominate the entire universe.

Enter at your own risk, whatever action you do,
what happens next will not be part of our
responsibility. Instead, better use DuckDuckGo.

https://www.google.com/

(This article was not sponsored by DuckDuckGo or
any other existing search engine)

-------------------------------------------------
>UNTIL NEXT TIME
AcidMail would not be possible if it weren't for
the cocky people over at NeoZones, one of the
worst s0-called "webhomes". To browse more bad
ideas by the NeoZones losers, check out their URL
over at: https://neozones.neocities.org/

Do you have anything that you want to see in next
week's issue of AcidMail? Is it a link, a comment,
a short story, or some art? Well whatever it is,
E-Mail it to us, and we will probably put it on
the next issue (with credit, of course!)

If you have any questions, comments, or anything
in between, please don't hesitate to E-Mail us!